The Kitty Life

It's strange how we became cat owners. We never planned it. In fact, my husband is deadly allergic to them. If he hangs around one too long, it starts up his asthma and he can't breathe. It's scary. So how did this happen?

It all started with Sam. One day my son and husband noticed a little black kitten on our front porch. It looked pathetic and they couldn't help but feed it. You know what happens after that.

We even tried to keep Sam in our house. But then we had that huge blizzard and lost power and the fur got really bad and my husband got really sick. I never want to go through that again!

Now Sam stays outside, but we let him go into my mom's garage when the weather is bad since the garage is mainly storage. Then one day he brought home a woman. New Kitty we call her. We thought it was just a fling. We hoped. Then one day we noticed she was really fat, but I assured everyone it was nothing! No way she was pregnant! Wistful thinking on my part.

Then one day she was suddenly skinny. Even my mom commented on it. I shrugged it off. Maybe she just lost some weight! A diet! Yes, that's it. Must be. Anorexic kitty.


That's when I got the call. "Mom! I saw a kitten!"


Crap. No denying it now. I reassured my husband. "There's only one kitten! Really. Ok, two kittens."


My son, "I think there's three."

Me: "Shit."

There ended up being four kittens. I tried to sugar coat it. Kept telling my husband three kittens since the fourth always seemed to be hiding anyway. Then one day it slipped out.

Four kittens.

She still won't let us near them. She hisses if we make sudden moves. She has a special call for them which is really cute. Sometimes I'll say, "Call your babies," and she will.

What's really funny is that at the end of the day, Sam will come home from a long day of kitty work and she'll be all over him while he eats his dinner. You can almost hear her saying, "OMG... You will not believe the day I had. Those kids are getting on my everlasting nerve! You need to do something with them."

My mom doesn't think they are Sam's kitten since he's an all black cat and all the kittens are shades of gray. I have no clue. I guess it doesn't matter. It's not like this is the Maury Povich show and I can gather all the neighborhood cats together and find the baby daddy.

Not to mention, neither one of these cats were mine to begin with!

Again, I ask, how did this happen? They are really cute kittens. Me and Scooter will stand at the door in the morning and watch them play while their beleaguered mother keeps an eye on them. I had no idea cats were such good mothers! Even half feral cats like New Kitty.

Eventually some will have to be given away and the adults neutered. We can't keep six cats! That's going dangerously into hoarding area and again, we aren't even cat people!

But this has definitely been a learning experience. I have learned that I'm a dog person for sure, but that I'm a sucker for a cute kitten.


Anyone want a cat? Or two?